VANCOUVER – An official press report from the Orthodox special-interest group OOFFI (Orthodox Opposed to Fast-time Fleshmeat Imagery) has complained about the new music video on Yuri Tube of the Monkle’s latest smash hit, “Eight Prayers a Week”.
The video shows a typical Orthodox family at several different typical points in a typical week, saying the typical prayers from the Typikon. One of the vignettes of the video shows the family at dinner, sitting down to a sumptuous feast that includes some sort of roast. (“I think it’s lamb,” says Yuri, lead guitar player for the group. “Definitely lamb,” agrees rhythm guitar player and lead vocalist Ivan.)
The problem, according to OOFFI spokesman Fr. Vasiliy Vasileivich (who appears to belong to just about every one of these crazy Orthodox special-interest groups)*, is that the video, containing as it does imagery of meat-eating, was released during the Theotokos fast (o.s.), thus raising the hackles of the group.
“We are not opposed to this rock of roll music,” explained Fr. Vasiliy, “but showing video of eating of meat during our Lady’s fast is violation of some sort of Orthodox prohibition somewhere, we are just being sure of it. And that was terrible running-on sentence, silly Onion Dome editor person. And another thing, this is not crazy special-interest group.”
“A group dedicated to watching Yuri Tube for meat-eating during fasts isn’t crazy?” asked our intrepid Editor.
“Is not just Yuri Tube we are watching. Also this Anaxios Television Network.”
Yuri Tube is an online outlet for Orthodox Christians to show home movies, music videos, amateur video productions, and test patterns based on well-known icons. It was founded by famous Russian famous-person Yuri Obskurov, whose website it occupies. “It does not matter what is your video,” says G. Obskurov, “is room for it on Yuri Tube. But please no dirty words or rude pictures.”
“And no meat during fast!” exclaimed Fr. Vasiliy, talking out of turn.
“Is always my turn,” added Fr. Vasiliy after having read the last paragraph.
“Thank you, Father Vasiliy and Gospodin Obskurov,” said our intrepid editor in a this-article-is-over sort of voice.
(NOTE: In a recent number of the Onion Dome, the rock group The Monkles was said to be from Kyiv, Ukraine. In fact the group is from Lower Nizhny, Russia. They’re just staying in Kyiv with Pavel’s brother, who moved to Kyiv after having married a Ukrainian woman (whose name isn’t really relevant so we’re not saying what it is). Onion Dome 2.0 regrets the error.)
This report was filed by you intrepid Onion Dome editor
* Mainly because this saves having to invent new characters with new personalities, accents, etc.
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