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Woman Ordered to Stop Crafting During Apostles’ Fast

OrganizedINDIANAPOLIS – A local woman was asked by her priest to refrain from crafting during the Apostles’ Fast. No painting, reupholstering, framing, sewing, crocheting, or knitting allowed.

“I can’t comment on the advice I give individual parishioners,” said Fr. Peter (“the Long-suffering”) Wilford wearily. “That’s private.”

“Well, he asked me to stop crafting until the feast day,” said Marina (“the Tireless–she’s from Serbia, she did the most amazing things, I’ll have to tell you abou–oh, shoot, dinner’s burning”) Johnson. “No, I don’t mind talking about it at all. It’s not a big deal.

“You see, when I craft, I tend to get caught up. I’m always improving things–I’m never satisfied with how they are. Like that wall over there. I swear there’s a smudge in the paint. I just redid it last week, but I’m thinking it needs touched up. Maybe I’ll sponge paint an accent color over it. Yeah, probably a lavender-grey, or maybe something with blue tones…

“It’s important to me to create a beautiful home. I’m always redoing my kitchen. I haven’t gone grocery shopping for fasting foods yet, so we’re living off rice and split pea soup, but I’ll take a trip to get some tofu, vegetables and beans just as soon as I make an organizer for all my coupons. I’ve taken up extreme couponing just this week! It’s been difficult, because I find myself getting distracted by other projects, like reconfiguring the icons in our icon corner so they’re organized by size and dominant color.

“Or my daughter’s bedroom, that takes up a lot of my time too. I just want her to have the best. It’s important to me that she has a desk where she can do her schoolwork, space to store her toys, and room for herself. Growing up is hard work, and I want her to have the room she needs to pursue her interests and study in peace. I mean, right now her desk is covered in organizational materials, but that’s just until we finish getting it all set up. I’m going to help her find the best possible way to store her papers, old letters, schoolwork, et cetera, just as soon as we finish building or maybe modding that Ikea shelf to store her books, toys and nicknacks.

“Her room will be just as beautiful as my son’s room was before he left for college. Now I’m in the midst of turning that room into Craft Central! I’m so proud of the curtains I made–I drag every visitor in to see them, and if they don’t ooh and aah over them I feel kind of hurt. I mean, I create my home so others can enjoy it too–I put a lot of work into it. Why, just last week I started re-wallpapering my guest bathroom using pages from an antique Japanese dictionary.

“But I guess now all that will have to wait just a little while. It’s funny, I’m not sure what I’ll do with all my time. Maybe take up jogging, I’ve been meaning to get in shape. And like I said, it’s not a big deal. It’s for my spiritual benefit, after all. Father Peter had good reasons to recommend it.”

Marina turned around to look at the projects she had in progress. “Yeah, I get it,” she said, staring towards her living room. “I’m just going to ask for a teeny dispensation to recover that chair.”

This report filed by terce reporter Brigid Strait. Copyright © 2012, All Rights Reserved.

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