Satire

Rules for Dating Our Orthodox Daughter

It does not matter if the calendar says it is a wine day. It does not matter if you are both in your twenties (or thirties). Wine is for married people, at home. Have some olive oil instead. Your chances for dating our daughter are helped if you are kind to the grandmothers in the […]

Ask Father Vasiliy

Once again Father Vasiliy Vasileivich, pastor of Saints Vladimir and Olga and Boris and Gleb Russian Orthodox Church in Sydney, Australia, and first runner-up for the seventh year in a row in the All-Australia Paddleboat Regata’s 100 Meter Splash-Dash, has condescended to answer questions from Onion Dome readers. Welcome, Father Vasiliy! Dear Father Vasiliy, I […]

Parishioner Brings Home Paschal Greeting in New Language

Plum Creek, Michigan, USA — Marsha (St. Joanna the Myrrhbearer) Winthrop brought back the Paschal greeting in a new language, which she learned on a spring vacation in Idaho. She told fellow worshipers that she attended Holy Week and Pascha services at All Saints of Middle Earth Church in Mystic Lake, Idaho, a town of […]

Parishioners Exhausted after Nine-hour Agape Vespers Service

FLAGSTAFF, Ariz. – Parishioners here at the multi-ethnic Church of All Saints of North America Originally from Somewhere Else were exhausted on Pascha afternoon after a 9-hour Agape Vespers service. In keeping with an ancient and widely-observed Orthodox tradition, All Saints of Somewhere Else celebrates Agape Vespers by having the gospel passage, John 20:19-25, read […]

The Paschal Canon (Facebook Style)

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